For British-born, New York-raised writer Coco Mellors, the path towards publishing her debut novel mirrored that of becoming a first-time mother: neither came easily, or on the timeline she’d expected. Cleopatra and Frankenstein, the humorous and poignant story of the shock waves caused by one couple’s impulsive marriage, made the UK Sunday Times bestseller list and is currently being developed into a TV series by Warner Bros.—yet the novel was rejected by thirty publishers before finding its home. And just one year ago, after months of trying to conceive, Coco experienced the devastating loss of her first pregnancy (which she wrote about beautifully here). Openly sharing the truth of those painful experiences with her community, says Coco—who is now in her third trimester of pregnancy—allowed her to move through grief with tenderness and grace.

We caught up with Coco (whose second novel, Blue Sisters, is due out in April 2024) near her home in Brooklyn—and chatted about her journey towards motherhood, the DÔEN dresses she’s been reaching for throughout her pregnancy, and what’s on her bookshelf right now.

Can you share a little about your pregnancy journey thus far? What have been some of the most significant moments you’ve experienced?

I would describe the first trimester as very beige. I was nauseous all day, every day from weeks five to thirteen and could only eat plain foods from my childhood like pasta with butter, Babybel cheese, animal crackers, vanilla milkshakes…I remember looking at myself at one point and feeling like I was becoming a Babybel.

Then on the first day of my second trimester I packed up our house in LA in preparation to move back to New York, then flew to Paris to teach at NYU’s summer program there and it was like, bam! Technicolor! The nausea lifted, I could eat fruit and veg again, all of life seemed to return to vibrant color.

And, so far, it has remained colorful! I traveled for almost my entire second trimester but probably my favorite part was going on my German book tour at six months pregnant. Touring is pretty relentless at the best of times, so I was trepidatious, but the kindness of the readers was incredible. I had dreamed of this baby, and this book, for so long and it felt like magic to be able to bring him along inside of me while doing what I love most.

What excites you most about becoming a mother? What makes you most nervous?

Passing on the love my mother gave to me. Every year of my life my mother would say, “This is my favorite age of yours” (even sixteen, when I was undeniably a nightmare). I hope I pass that onto my child—that sense of being unequivocally delighted in at every single stage.

I’m most nervous about the time management aspect. I often don’t start writing until I’ve had many hours of putzing around (what I call my “imagination time,” but I fear may just be glorified procrastination). From what I hear motherhood affords very little time for putzing, so I think I’m going to have to get a lot more disciplined!

Are there any special family traditions from your childhood (or your husband Henry’s) that you plan to bring into your child’s life?

My husband and I are both from England and rather shamefacedly speak no other languages, so actually we’re hoping to break the tradition of monolingualism we inherited and raise a child who also speaks another language. I’m voting for French—arguably not the most practical, but is there anything chicer than casually being able to speak French?!

You’ve spoken about how your path towards becoming a mother mirrored your path towards publishing your first book. Can you say a little more about that? 

It took me five years to finish Cleopatra and Frankenstein and then a long time to sell it, with many rejections along the way. When we started trying for a baby, I found there were a lot of parallels between the journey to publishing and conception in terms of making oneself vulnerable to what many of us fear most: disappointment, failure, heartache.

My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, an experience that is sadly so common for women and birthing people, yet still steeped in loneliness. I wanted the experience to tenderize rather than abrade me, and I’ve found the way to do that is by being open about it. The central question of my second novel Blue Sisters is: how do you go on loving the world in the face of grief? I found, for me, the answer is always human connection.

As you move along in your pregnancy, what does your community look like? Who have you been looking to for advice along the way, and what’s giving you the most comfort?

I’m a huge believer in the power of the chitty chat. When I was struggling to conceive again after my miscarriage, the comfort I took from talking to others who had been there was immeasurable. I’m also almost eight years sober and have a wonderful recovery community who I can be honest with.

I was surprised by how many complex feelings came up for me in this pregnancy; I was thrilled to be pregnant, terrified of miscarrying again, and still grieving that first baby we lost, all while trying to give my all to finishing my second novel and promoting my first one. For anyone who is currently longing for a child or grieving a loss, no matter what that looks like, I just want to say that my heart is with you. It is not an easy time of life, and we need and deserve all the support and community we can get.

What kinds of things have you been wearing lately? How, if at all, has your personal style changed since becoming pregnant?

I think the central tension of pregnancy dressing is wanting to look like yourself but not wanting to spend lots of money on clothes you won’t wear again. I truly thank god for the many elasticated and tie-waist DÔEN dresses I’ve collected over the years (“another one?!” my husband would say each time I brought a new one home), but I feel immensely justified now because I’ve managed to wear them through my entire pregnancy so far, either alone or layered with tights and sweaters, and still, most crucially, feel like me.

What are you reading right now? Any books you’ve loved recently?

I’m currently reading The Wren, The Wren by Anne Enright and recently read and loved Elif Batuman’s The Idiot and its sequel Either/Or.